STONES IN MY PLACE

You showed me things I could not explain, put tomorrow in my dreams, things I knew did not come from me, gave me instructions I knew were from You, and still, I found reasons not to move. I knew what to do, yet somehow, knowing, never became doing. And I hate that I cannot even say I didn’t know. I knew. I just kept postponing obedience like You were going to keep asking forever. I called it waiting, when sometimes it was fear. I called it discernment, when sometimes it was distraction. I called it “not yet,” when You had already said, “Go.” Sometimes I wonder what would happen, if I took You as seriously, as You have been taking me. Because You keep showing me things, and I keep sleeping on them. You keep speaking, and I keep scrolling. You keep giving me instructions, and I keep telling myself I will do it tomorrow. If I refuse to praise You, If I refuse to go, You can send someone else. If I keep playing with what You gave me, You can still accomplish everything You said. You will still be God. Your purpose will still stand. and what frightens me most, is not that I might miss the prophecy, but that Your purpose will not miss its hour. If I refuse to become the stone that cries out, You will find stones in my place. I don’t want someone else carrying what You trusted me with. I don’t want to look back one day and realize I had everything I needed but I was too afraid, too distracted, too lazy to become who You called me to be. Because You do not need me, Father. You only invited me. You do not need my voice to remain God, nor my hands to accomplish Your will. You told me, “If you’re serious about Me, I’d be serious about you.” And I have been so unserious, with the One who has never been careless with me. So here I am,, not asking You to need me, but begging You to make me willing, before the stones learn my song.